Where will I be in twenty years … what will my life look like? Have you ever asked yourself this question? Since I don’t know where I want to be, I don’t know how to answer. Every now and then – as I attempt to write this out – I need to distract myself so I don’t make my head explode or crawl under my bed and tuck into a fetal position.
.
.
I am remarkably immature and hilarious – yet delightfully knowledgeable – for a 43 year old architect. These traits have served me well in the past because I lack substantial body strength and if you are going to be a know-it-all, you’d better have a good sense of humor about it. I have chosen to believe that working with me is so much fun (while delivering a top-notch product) that I have escaped the swirly twirly stink-hole of death (AKA the last 3 years) relatively unscathed. I don’t need to tell most of you that the economy has re-purposed umpteen thousands of architects into the role of meeter/greeter or coffee barista over the last few years. The idea that I am one (more) crazy House & Senate vote away from losing my job because nobody has any money to spend on luxury items (like hiring me) has kept me awake at night.
How will I provide for my family? Can I continue to make my mortgage payments? Jokes don’t pay the bills … unless you are really funny (which I am not) and can sell them to other people. (sigh) Carrot Top already has the bad jokes/ stupid look angle covered and working together with the stage name “Carrot Top and Whitey” just doesn’t sound right.
One thought that passed through my head was if I do get laid off, I would hang my shingle out and make a go at this myself. For most architects, this thought rattles around the noggin a lot. If you don’t like the piece of the pie you get where you work, (or there is no pie) go out on your own and make your own pie. Most of my friends are reaching that stage in their lives where they could benefit from someone with my talents, I suppose if push came to shove, this would have to be something I’d consider.
In twenty years, what will the field of architecture look like and will that be something that I want to be a part of? The fun bits of my job are getting smaller and smaller every day and I have to look for new items of interests, some way to stay engaged. This post is getting depressing but I suppose that is something that all architects are having to deal with. I can tell people my houses appreciate more than builder homes, I can point out that a large percentage of my architectural fee is normally recovered during the cost of construction by identifying issues before they’re built rather than solving the problem by pulling out the checkbook. How do I make the next 20 years better for me? I don’t have a clue … I can’t easily make people believe in doing something that they aren’t already inclined to believe.
What that means, to anyone who has stuck with me this far, is that I need to make the next twenty years about the journey and not the destination. I need to be a better father and husband. I need to wrestle with my daughter more often … I need to wrestle with my wife more often. I need to laugh a little harder, judge a little easier, drink by myself a little less and drink with friends a little more (not counting the 8 glasses of water a day since we’ll all be eating our food in capsule form).
In twenty years I’ll be 63 years old and just hitting my stride. I hope that things have gone well for me and my family, hopefully my daughter still loves me like she does right now, hopefully my wife still remembers why she married me, hopefully in twenty years…
.
.. I’ll still be hopeful.
.
photos are from icultist’s photostream on Flickr (used under creative commons license)
.
.